WEEK 2 RECAP • TIDE SPRING LEAGUE • APRIL 9, 2026 By Jordan Clarke
Four Unbeaten. One Ambush. Zero Answers.
The favourites are set. The pretenders are exposed. And the Spring League just declared war on Week 1.
16 TEAMS • 2 WEEKS • 74 GOALS • 4 UNBEATEN
Two weeks in.
Sixteen games. Seventy-four goals. Four teams playing a different sport.
Week 1 was the warmup. Week 2 was a statement — or, in one case, a retraction. A hat-trick hero came out of nowhere. A keeper is running a sportsbook and outperforming his own lines. The gap between the top four and the rest of the league just got real.
Let’s get into it.
§ 01 • THE RANKINGS • WEEK 2
TIDE Spring League
Power Rankings
Forget the table. Points are a lagging indicator. This is where teams actually stand after two weeks of real football — goals, defence, draft DNA, vibes all weighted appropriately.
| POS | TEAM | W–L–D | GD | TAG |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 01 | FOREST GREEN | 2–0 | +7 | The Wall |
| 02 | PURPLE | 2–0 | +6 | Clean Sheets Club |
| 03 | NAVY | 2–0 | +8 | The Blitz |
| 04 | ROYAL BLUE | 2–0 | +5 | The Bookie |
| 05 | GREY | 1–1 | −5 | Upset Artists |
| 06 | WHITE | 1–1 | +1 | Sneaky |
| 07 | GOLD | 1–1 | 0 | Counter-Punchers |
| 08 | SILVER | 1–1 | +1 | Exposed |
| 09 | KELLY GREEN | 1–1 | −3 | Professional |
| 10 | BLACK | 1–1 | +2 | The Young Core |
| 11 | ORANGE | 1–1 | 0 | Disciplined |
| 12 | LIME | 0–1–1 | −1 | Penalty Win |
| 13 | YELLOW | 0–1–1 | −5 | Searching |
| 14 | RED | 0–2 | −4 | Cruel Luck |
| 15 | PINK | 0–2 | −6 | Heart Over Blueprint |
| 16 | TEAL | 0–2 | −6 | The Fortress |
01 Forest Green — The Wall
Two games. Two clean sheets. Nothing close.
Curtis Flynn has yet to be properly tested, and there is no guarantee he will be. The Steelheads spine of Flynn and Justin Parish has this team organised in ways most Spring League sides won’t figure out by June.
If there’s a title favourite on April 9th, it’s them. Book it.
02 Purple — Clean Sheets Club
Jai Irvine. John Lohsen. Jonte Lohsen. Whatever keeper Ellie Irvine writes on the lineup card, nothing is getting past them. The Leversedge Cup energy is all over this squad.
Their 1–0 knock on a plucky White side was quieter than the 5–0 opener. Frankly, more impressive. The best teams win ugly. Purple just won ugly and didn’t need an apology.
03 Navy — The Blitz
Eleven goals in two games. Eleven.
Herman Parmar has five of them by himself. Rowan Smith and Tristan Price are trading assists like Pokémon cards. Everett Piper is the fourth option. Start drafting your excuses.
The only reason they’re not #1: Kai Joseph has already fished three out of his net. At the top of this league, zero conceded is the price of admission. That matters. Slightly.
04 Royal Blue — The Bookie
The quietest 2–0 in the league. 2–0 over Teal. 5–2 over Red. Cade Smith on four points. Cliff MacFarlane and Declan Sanders have this team playing structured, don’t-do-anything-stupid football — the kind that wins cups.
And Owen Papineau is running a full sportsbook out of his goalie gloves while keeping clean sheets. Paps is playing chess. Everyone else is playing checkers.
The house is winning.
05 Grey — Upset Artists
Ugly GD. Ugly Week 1. Pretty Week 2.
Peter Wynne. Miles Boulton. Ella Dupuy. Luke Massey. Marshall Wilkins. The Steelheads pair is finally getting the respect the draft board never gave them. More on the ambush below.
06 White — Sneaky
Two goals conceded in two games. Only loss: 1–0 to Purple. Connor Crichton and Tim den Hartigh’s “eight keepers in a trench coat” strategy is quietly humming.
Sneaky dangerous. Nobody is talking about them. Exactly how they like it.
07 Gold — Counter-Punchers
Michael Daniels has four points. Gold put four on Pink. Jaeda Douglas and Mike Bellefleur built a team that punches back. Mid-table now. Not a team you want to catch on the right night.
08 Silver — Exposed
The 3–0 beating from Forest Green exposed cracks. Mike Carroll’s blue-card knee-drop is already ref-room legend.
Poppy White’s decision to pick Silver over White is starting to look like a betting slip Paps wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole. At least the jerseys are still clean.
09 Kelly Green — Professional
1–0 over Orange was professional. Kelly Hall remains weekly theatre. Xitiluq Hwitsum is steady. Two goals in two games won’t win a title. It will win a few Monday nights.
10 Black — The Young Core
The clinical five-goal opener still happened. Josh Gilbert leads them in scoring with four points.
Lavender White, Gideon Clarke, Micah Croswell, Kalvin and the rest of the young core are learning what it looks like to be the hunted, and there are enough experienced heads on the roster to steady the ship.
Good people on every line of the team sheet. This is a squad figuring out its chemistry in real time. It will take a few weeks to find the version of themselves that put five past their Week 1 opponent and not the version that came unstuck against Grey.
When they do, don’t be surprised if they climb back up in a hurry.
11 Orange — Disciplined
Tianna Chau and Taya Brubacher have Orange disciplined and hard to score on. They just can’t find the net themselves. Two goals in two games is a cry for help from the forwards.
12 Lime — Penalty Win
The 2–2 draw with Yellow is only interesting because of the “PW” on the form column. Somewhere, someone is still arguing about that shootout. Matt Archambault and Al Casta’s side is not out of the conversation.
13 Yellow — Searching
See above. The point is nice. The −5 is not. Megan Branch’s squad is one finishing clinic away from being a different team.
14 Red — Cruel Luck
Evan Mayer: three goals in two games. Zero points to show for it.
Cruel league. Sal Seif and Shelbie Paddle’s Red has been in every match — a goalkeeping problem away from having something to show for it.
15 Pink — Heart Over Blueprint
The scoreboard reads rough. The spirit is anything but.
George White — founder of this whole thing, patron saint of Cowichan Valley Monday nights — and Chris Watson built Pink the way the Spring League is supposed to be built. Family. Friends. The belief that a team that loves being on the pitch together will figure out the rest.
Ten of thirteen Pink players listed “attacking” as their draft preference. Nobody is pretending that’s a defensive blueprint. Nobody in that dressing room is losing sleep over it either.
If any team in this league is most likely to smile through a rough start and come out on fire, it’s this one. Count them out at your own peril.
16 Teal — The Fortress
Zero goals. In two games.
Sarah and Nic Jones built a defensive fortress from the draft board up. Nine of thirteen players prefer to defend. Exactly the result the equation predicted.
The Steelheads defensive philosophy is alive and well in Teal. They just need to remember what a shot on goal looks like before June arrives.
The Main Event: The Gospel of Grey
The 7:35 PM match was supposed to be a formality.
Black were the flavour of the month after a clinical five-goal opener. Grey were coming off a 3–8 mauling by Navy. The bookie had a line. Nobody liked Grey’s side of it.
Then Miles Boulton happened.
3 GOALS. 1 GAME. 1 UNKNOWN.
Miles Boulton, from a player who wasn’t on anyone’s radar seven days ago.
Boulton is now tied for the league lead in points (4G, 0A) and is, according to the Ref’s Corner, one half of the “Salt and Pepper” partnership with Peter Wynne. If you weren’t paying attention to Grey, start.
The win was earned on the defensive end. Peter Wynne was everywhere. Ella Dupuy slammed the gate when the pressure came. Luke Massey and Marshall Wilkins brought the Steelheads spine the draft board never properly valued. First to every second ball. Organised under pressure. Clinical when the chances came.
Black’s afternoon, meanwhile, came unstuck in net.
Justin Paulson took the gloves and shipped three in quick succession. From there, the wheels came off in a way every Spring League team eventually experiences at least once: the keeper abandoned his post, started sprinting the ball up the pitch as an attacking option, and drew visible frustration from his own teammates.
Grey didn’t need to chase. They closed the gate. They took their chances.
Final: Grey 4, Black 2.
This is the league. You can have the talent. You can have the opening-week scoreline. You can walk in with every reason to be confident. And still lose a Monday night to a better-organised side and a ninety-minute lapse in discipline.
The table in April is a suggestion. Not a verdict.
Nobody Has Scored On Forest Green
It bears repeating because it might define the season.
2 GAMES. 0 GOALS ALLOWED. NOTHING.
And Forest Green plays in the same league as Navy — a team averaging five and a half goals per game.
Whenever those two finally meet (it’s not on the April schedule), it becomes the most anticipated fixture on the calendar. Unstoppable force. Immovable object. Paps probably already has a line on it.
Curtis Flynn was supposed to be splitting keeper minutes. Two clean sheets in, there’s no obvious reason to take him off.
Navy’s Torrid Pace
Eleven goals in two games. Four of the league’s top ten scorers wear Navy.
| PLAYER | LINE | NOTE |
|---|---|---|
| Herman Parmar | 5G, 0A | Not interested in sharing. |
| Rowan Smith | 2G, 2A | Trading assists like Pokémon cards. |
| Tristan Price | 1G, 3A | The setup man. |
| Everett Piper | 1G | Fourth option, still scoring. |
This is either the best draft in Spring League history or the softest Week 1–2 schedule a team has ever been handed. Probably both.
The one thing to watch: Kai Joseph has already conceded three. If Navy runs into a team that can actually finish at the other end, the shootout might not go their way.
The Bookie Has A Clean Sheet
Quick update from the Paps Desk.
Owen Papineau’s Royal Blue: two goals conceded, one clean sheet through Week 2. The man setting lines on everyone else’s matches is walking the walk.
A keeper running a sportsbook while earning clean sheets is either extremely suspicious or extremely professional. The jury is out.
Cooked / Cooking
Cooked
- Any narrative that had Forest Green as “just another mid-table outfit”
- Teal’s offensive output, full stop
- The idea that Grey were Week 2 cannon fodder
- The Week 1 table as a predictor of anything
Cooking
- Forest Green’s defensive wall
- Miles Boulton, from unknown to headline act in ninety minutes
- Purple’s GD column and everything the Lohsens are doing in goal
- The bookie’s reputation
Sin Bin Watch
Mike Carroll (Silver). Justin Marinier (Royal Blue). Paulo Pheasey (Kelly Green). Isaiah Clarke (Black). Justin Paulson (Black).
All sitting on two demerits. Four-to-six and you’re in front of the discipline committee.
Like the All Blacks say: no dickheads. Play hard. Play clean. Keep the elbows at home. The refs are out there every Monday night making sure everyone gets to play. Treat them accordingly.
Bottom Line
Two weeks down. Thirteen to go.
Four teams are playing a different sport. One team has forgotten what a goal looks like. A keeper-bookie is outperforming his own lines. The Ref’s Corner has a new power couple named Salt and Pepper.
The favourites are set.
The pretenders are exposed.
And the upset artists just proved that a defensive clinic and a hat-trick hero can still rewrite a Monday night.
See you at the pitch.